Friday, January 14, 2011

Bullies, Victims, and Witnesses

We all have hopes of accomplishing our dreams and achieving our goals. 
But that may be difficult for someone who is a victim of bullying.

When I was in fifth grade, my younger sister and I attended the same school and rode the school bus together. We were constantly bullied by the same boy as we got off the bus to enter school. He was always pushing or grabbing us in inappropriate places. We were humiliated and scared. It was hard for us to focus on learning because we always feared what he might do next.

At the time, my sister and I were not even aware that we were both being harassed by the same boy. This may have been because we were not right behind one another when getting off the school bus. Whatever the reason, we were just not aware that we both were going through the same agonizing ordeal.

There was something else we were unaware of until we became adults. Every night before going to sleep, we both prayed about the situation. I would ask God to move the boy away from me or move me away from him. My sister's prayer was basically the same.

Then one day as I was sitting on the school bus, I realized the bully was not on the bus. I was so relieved.

Shortly after we settled into school, an announcement came over the PA system.

The bully I dreaded was dead.

I sat there thinking, "Is it wrong that I am not sad."

Later that afternoon, I learned that that same boy picked on a certain dog everyday, poking him with sticks through the fence, until one day the dog jumped over the fence and killed him.

Throughout our school years, my three sisters and I had to deal with bullies. We all had different ways of dealing with bullies, and somehow we survived. But, what we did not realize was the negative consequences that result from being victims of bullies.

You see, it's hard to focus on learning when your thoughts are preoccupied with: What if this happens or what if that happens. And when you can't focus on learning, you don't learn to your full potential. And when you don't learn to your full potential, it could get in the way of accomplishing dreams or achieving goals.

Bullying can cause negative consequences on victims, bullies, and witnesses. Victims and witnesses can develop problems with learning, as well as physical and mental health issues due to stress and anxiety. Bullies can end up being convicted of a crime, and can also develop mental health issues such as depression.

There are different types of bullying: verbal, physical, social, psychological and cyber.
If you or someone you know is a victim of bullying, please seek help.

*Click on or copy and paste the following links for Resources to Help Stop Bullying: ~ ~


  1. This is really a great post about bullying and it's affects on everyone. It is an issue that is very personal to me because of the experiences I had with it growing up. This week a high school senior in a nearby town committed suicide because of bullying. This really does have to stop. I am very sorry that you and your sisters were bullied in school....and then hearing that your bully died like!

    Thank you for stopping by my place and commenting so that I could come visit you. I will be back!

  2. Anita, what a sad thing to read. I am so sorry that you and your sisters had to suffer through that at a time that should have been happy and carefree for you. Bullying is such a terrible problem, it isn't to strong to say that it makes me sick to my stomach when I think about the people who live in fear of going to school, work, etc because somebody else makes it miserable or unbearable for them. Why do people do this and is it more common now or is it just that people discuss it more? When I was in school, honestly I saw NO bullying. Then again, small town and small school. Still, it breaks my heart. What can we do?

    I know that I will teach my children to really care for others and to stand up for them if they see this sort of thing (at least I'll try) and hopefully to talk to me as well...

    Anyway what you wrote really touched me. Take care of yourself and I really look forward to getting to know you!

    Have a lovely day.

  3. Wow! This is so heart felt. When I was in school I was constantly harrassed by this guy name Jerry, as short as he was you would think he wouldn't be harrassing any body. But now that I think about it, I think that was his way of looking big to the other guys. You know picking on a vunerable young girl. I often have wondered what type of man did he grow up to be. Hopefully a loving husband and loving father.

  4. Hola Anita. Saludos desde Argentina

  5. Great blog!

  6. This is a great post and very necessary to promote the fight against bullies!


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